Into the Tunnel

So my friend Ginny recently likened this chemo anxiety I'm having to the fear of going into a tunnel without knowing how dark the tunnel will get before I make it out to the other side.  I thought that was a great analogy, and it got me thinking about one of the SCARIEST MOVIES I have ever seen.

Before I name the movie, I have to say to all you horror film aficionados that I am not, myself, personally a connoisseur of scary movies so if you think I'm a wimp for finding this particular movie "the scariest" I don't care.  I also don't care to hear what movie is scarier because I won't see it: I get way too scared! 

But I married a lover of scary movies and while usually he goes it alone we were up in Seattle one week years ago and we each picked a movie we wanted to see while we were there.  I chose "Little Miss Sunshine."  G chose "The Descent."

For those of you who haven't seen this movie, it is about a group of women who go spelunking in unknown caves in the Appalachian Mountains.  Now, to be honest with you, probably a movie just about spelunking would be scary to me but (SPOILER ALERT!) not only do they climb through too-small tunnels that collapse behind them cutting off their only known route of escape, they also encounter the flesh-eating cave dwellers who are among the creepiest movie creeps ever:

 
They have to fight off these scary monsters that are blind but have sonar-sense and in doing so they hide in pools of blood and other gross stuff. 

My point of this post? 

I WOULD NEVER GO SPELUNKING, or SPELUNK, or whatever you call it, because I would never voluntarily rappel down to middle earth and crawl through tunnels which may or may not collapse behind me! 

Likewise, I do not want to voluntarily  hook myself up to a machine that will inject my body with poisons that may (or may not) give me constipation or diarrhea, nausea, hair loss, darkened nail beds, mouth sores, chemo brain & fatigue!

I guess chemo isn't really voluntary, though, is it?  So my descent begins in two days.  On the bright side: I'm killing cancer!  On the even BRIGHTER side, I won't have to deal with any sonar-powered-flesh-eating-cave-dwellers.

So there's that!