Home from the Hospital

Friday I had my bilateral mastectomy and sentinel node biopsy.

Here is a photo of the view from my room:

Thursday afternoon I went into the doctor for my mapping procedure--where a dye was injected into my breast.  Then during the surgery, Dr. Naik used a sensor to find the sentinel node and remove it.  It tested POSITIVE for cancer, so that meant more lymph nodes were removed.  The surgery lasted about 7 hours I think...not that I know, but it was a L - O - N - G day for Greg!

Of course, this news about the lymph node is a bummer to me, but in emailing with Dr. Chui he is confident this cancer did not grow or spring up during the chemo.  And remember: I did things a little backwards since most people have surgery first, then chemo!  I comfort myself with that reminder along with his optimism that my most effective course of treatment--tamoxifen--is still ahead of me.  This may also mean I have to do radiation (BOO!) but I will, of course, keep on fighting the good fight.

While in the hospital I was visited by surgeons, plastic surgeons, physical therapists, nurses, CNAs, friends & family.   They brought me fun breathing toys and exercise handouts and discharge plans.

I've been sent home and have accumulated quite a collection of drugs: anti-biotics (which have, unfortunately, given me horrible diarrhea), pro-biotics (which I was not pro-active enough about...but am being so now), laxative (yeah...not taking that) anymore, lorazepam (taking that), anti-nausea meds (taking that), anti-diarrheal meds (taking that), oxycodone (lots of that), ibuprofen & acetaminophen.

I also have lovely draining tubes inserted into the sides of my chest and pinned to my shirt.  I empty them every handful of hours.  SUPER-glamorous, you guys!

Before....

....and after!

Since returning home I've basically had NO appetite to speak of.  I did force myself to eat toast today so I could take a pro-bioitic.  I also waffle between being FREEZING COLD and shivering to being overheated and drenched with sweat.  I honestly look like a bald NBA player with perspiration dripping down my face.  It's crazy & gross, especially since I can't wear any deoderant or anti-perspirant.

I think what I'm getting at, here, people, is that the last few days have basically sucked.  My prognosis is slightly worse but presumably not fatal, I'm smelly and sweaty and then have shivers so bad my muscles hurt, my incision sites are tender but according to people who know better than I do, they are "lovely..."

On the plus side: O trick-or-treated for the first time ever tonight (as Sheriff Woody) with his Granny and Daddy, and I'm winning my Fantasy Football game.  So there's that.

I'm sure later this week my post will be better and more optimistic, so you'll need to check back in then...Until then, keep on keepin' on!

Tomorrow's The BIG DAY

In a few short hours I will head to the nuclear medicine department at OHSU to have a dye injected into my lymph nodes for tomorrow's sentinel node biopsy.

We'll have a quiet night at home tonight.  I have to shower tonight, and again tomorrow (apparently they want me really, really clean!) and, of course, NO food or drink after midnight tonight.

I will check in for my surgery at 8:30 in the morning, so I wouldn't expect to be all done by mid to late afternoon tomorrow.  Realistically, my next post here won't be for at least a couple of days but I would say No News is Good News and just check back after Halloween to see what I've been up to!

To those of you who have sent notes my way over these last few days, thanks.  As you can imagine, I've been busy at work (having played a little pre-surgical hooky in Chicago) getting my caseload ready for my co-workers to cover while I'm away, so I haven't had a chance to respond to each note personally.  That does not mean your notes go unread or unappreciated, though!

SO: until the next post, thanks for your positive energy, prayers, and thoughts that you may choose to send my way tomorrow. 

The Windy (& Pink) City

HEY!

Did you know OCTOBER is BREAST CANCER AWARENESS month?  (From now on, that's BCA for short.)

Once again, I'm reminded of that at almost every turn...and I guess it's nice but also, yeah, I am aware of that.

On Friday, G and I left Portland for a long weekend in Chicago.  This is the first time we've both left O alone at the same time.  I confess I shed some tears when I dropped him off at daycare Friday morning.  I think that's due in part to the fact that not only will I not see him this whole weekend, but then I get back and within 72 hours I'll be having my surgery.  And once I have my surgery there's no picking up O for I don't know how long...but weeks.  And that's going to be REALLY REALLY HARD (for me....he's a resilient little dude who will relish the additional time with Daddy, Granny & Grandpa).

ANYWAY: G has a conference here and I'm tagging along for fun.  Friday night we had dinner at a restaurant attached to our hotel and there in the bar menu was the drink that, if ordered, would result in $1 being donated to BCA.

Then on Saturday, I met my sorority little sister miss liz at 900 N. Michigan to shop.  It was so great to see her and catch up--it had been exactly a year since we were last together at Whittier College's Homecoming!  At the Mall, I learned that Bloomingdale's is REALLY into BCA month...

Elsewhere in the city, buildings have pink lights....here's a pic from last year I found online:

Last night we had dinner out and in the elevator at the hotel there was a lady with a pink Hard Rock Guitar pin, complete with the BCA pink ribbon.

I'm just saying, there are lots of reminders.  It gets to be a bit much, but then I guess I'm glad that I don't have some other cancer like Ovarian Cancer because I'd probably be even MORE annoyed!  I mean, can you imagine having some other type of cancer?  What a bummer Breast Cancer month would be. 

I guess I just need to let this all go, right?  I mean, I'm on vacation...I need to just relax and enjoy myself whether surrounding by pink or not.  It has been nice and relaxing so far.  Tomorrow I will go with G for the keynote address of the conference, then meet another friend from college for lunch!  It's so great that I'm getting to catch up with people while we're here...

Other than that, not much to report.  This time next week I'll probably be home in an upright position complaining about my surgery.  I've definitely got some anxiety about all that, but I'll be glad it's OVER!  Before I left town I got all of my pre-op appointments done--blood work, flu shot, chest xray & EKG on Wednesday--and all look good.

Think Pink

Hey!  Did you know OCTOBER is Breast Cancer Awareness Month?

I have to admit, I paid much less attention to such things this time last year...and while I mostly find it touching occasionally it can be a bit much...

That having been said, some things have been really amazing to me.

First, as I already mentioned, a co-worker and friend ran her first 5K in the Susan G Komen Race for the Cure.

Another co-worker and friend is on a Dragon Boat team in Portland that honors those who have breast cancer, and I was on their list:

Once again, my technological savvy fails me on the "Rotate Image" front...

And still ANOTHER co-worker and friend has boys who play football.  Pink gear was "optional" and his son was the only one who wore it in honor of "Booby Cancer" as they call it at their place.

And, finally, my Whittier College sorority (technically we're not really a "sorority," we're called the Metaphonian Society) participated in a Pink Shawl walk and surprised me with these photos on Facebook:

It's funny, because I really, truly find these gestures all so very touching.  

Contrast that with today, when I'm at OHSU for my appointments and there is another obvious breast cancer patient who wants to talk / bond and I am just so...not...into it.  I know that's weird, and I have no idea why I feel that way but I do.

As for today's appointments: I had a mammogram and ultrasound and verified what Dr. Chui and I have known for a while--the tumor has shrunk by more than half.  

I also met with my breast surgeon, Dr. Naik, and Nurse Christine to review what to expect on my surgery.  Dr. Naik says I should expect to take 3-4 weeks to recover completely.  That seems like a long time for a surgery that only requires a one or two night hospital stay...but there's lots to look forward to during those weeks--chest tightness, draining tubes that have to be emptied twice a day, sleeping sitting up for the first several days, not being able to lift my arms above shoulder-height--just MORE glamour for ME!

I do have some films from my first mammogram and the one today.  I am going to compare them and see if the untrained eye can really tell the difference between the two.  If so, I will try to scan them and post them here in the next couple of days...

A Long Overdue Update

The only problem with blogging is when you don't do it for a while, people start to worry.

There is nothing to be worried about, though--things here are fine!  I have just been tired and there really hasn't been much to report.

As you know, the 29th was my last day of chemo and I am very happy to be done with all of that!  The cumulative effects of the A/C and the leftover effects of Taxol have definitely taken their toll.  I'm very, very tired.  I go to work to cover my own appearances and then go home to nap until the next one.  As you know, I had a fingernail removed last week and that has taken some getting used to.  The nail bed is very tender and a bit tight as well.  The finger doesn't bend as well, but that's probably just a matter of keeping it soft with lotions.  Every day it hurts a little less, though, so that is good.  According to the doctor it will take about 6 months before it grows back.  I'm done with the antibiotics and am happy to report that the feared side effects were prevented, but my stomach was quite upset the whole week and it's tough to know whether that was from the chemo, the antibiotics, the probiotics or some combination...

This past week G and his brother went on a trip which meant O & I getting spoiled at our house by my parents.  It's been nice again, even if my Mom's gotten a bit crazy with her home re-org....

The long and short of it, though: every day is a bit better and I am anxious to get my strength up and get my surgery DONE.  Next week I will have my pre-op mammogram, ultrasound, and meeting with my surgeon Dr. Naik.

Until then, I don't know that there will be much to report.  We're just having a nice relaxing weekend for now and we'll see what this week has in store for me.